From the Pastor’s Heart

Many of us find grief a long and difficult journey. We wonder if we will ever laugh again and truly mean it. We wonder if we will ever dance again with joyful enthusiasm. We begin to wonder if all of our remaining days will be clouded with sorrow. We wonder….

I recently read the following story about a grief support group.

“The first session of the grief support group was gut-wrenching. One by one, the broken, lost grieving people shared their stories. Each person’s life had moved from normal to shattered, because of cancer, car accidents, heart attacks, or other tragedies that robbed them of their loved one. Raw emotion and buckets of tears accompanied story after story about how those real life losses manifested themselves in daily life.

One woman shared, ‘Last night I dreamed the doorbell rang and when I opened the door, my husband was standing there. He was no longer thin and sick from cancer. He was no longer bald from chemotherapy. He was healthy and strong like he used to be. When I woke up, I realized that I’ve only been grieving so far for the loss of my sickly husband and haven’t even begun to grieve over the loss of my strong, healthy husband.’

Another group member tentatively shared that he had spent the night, more than once, lying on his wife’s grave because ‘it is the only place I can feel close to her.’

One woman lamented the sheer terror at the idea of facing the holidays alone.

The room was filled with deep, real grief. It was tearing people apart. One member of the group asked, ‘Will we ever feel differently? How will we ever come out of this?’ As the facilitator, I knew it was important that my response paint a picture of hope. ‘I know it is hard to imagine, but I believe the day will come when you will smile again….when you will be able to enjoy life,’ I said gently, finding it a little hard to imagine myself.

After working closely with these people for about a year, I moved to another city. Years later, I returned to the town for a speaking engagement. Just before I was to speak, I was surprised to see many of the members of the grief group, seated on the front row.

Later, when I greeted them, some told me of new relationships in their lives, new jobs, and traveling adventures. I asked if they still met together as a group and they laughed, ‘You won’t believe this, but we only meet now to go line dancing.’

A line dancing grief group…who would have thought? But when God shows up, healing happens, hope springs forth, and new life emerges.”

Sunday, November 1 we will celebrate All Saint’s Sunday. It will be a day when we remember loved ones who have died in the last year. Yes, there will be tears and raw grief. There will be those who will wonder if it will ever get any better. We will share our grief and we will remember. We will remember our loved ones.

We will also rejoice because we will also remember that we are not alone in our troubles. We are not alone in our losses, our grief, and our heartache. God is with us.

We will celebrate the risen Christ who whispers in the darkness: ‘Didn’t I tell you, you would see the glory of God? Didn’t I tell you this is not over yet? Didn’t I tell you God will wipe away every tear?’

We no longer have to wonder because when God shows up (and God always shows up) even grief groups will line dance one day.

I pray you will show up this All Saint’s Sunday because God is going to show up and remind each of us that we will dance again.

Thanks be to God!

Pastor Russel

Have you ever been curious about something? Every morning when I am walking Louie I pass a vacant house on the corner of Blackburn and Centennial. It has been vacant for over three years (since my arrival to Sewickley) and perhaps much longer. I have watched the vines grow up over the front door and the wicker chair on the porch crumble. There are wax Christmas candles in the window. The curtains are looking dingy. On what appears to be the dinning room table is a flower arrangement that long ago dried up and in the middle of that arrangement is a flower pick with a little card. I am curious. I wonder about the owner’s story. Why has the house remained untouched all of these years? Did the person who lived there receive an arrangement of flowers when he or she was sick? Did the owner of the home die? Did he/she have to make other living arrangements?

People’s stories are interesting. Our stories help define who and what we are. During the interviewing process for a custodian we interviewed a gentleman who had listed on his resume that he had worked on a track gang. I could relate. I too worked as a laborer on a track gang. We were able to connect and share our stories.

Some on our committee were surprised to learn of my “track gang” experiences. One even said, “Pastor Russel, I can’t even imagine you working at a job where you would get your hands dirty!” Often times our stories may seem unimaginable. But they are a part of our fabric woven into our very being.

We all have our stories to share. In our individual families we tell our stories again and again. Telling our stories is one way of remembering our loved ones and keeping them close. Telling our stories makes us “family.”

God’s house should be a safe place where we can come together to share our stories as a family. Some stories we eagerly celebrate. There are other stories that give birth to pain and grief. Often times sharing these stories brings healing. Sometimes we are surprised to learn that we share a common bond because our stories are so similar.

We come to God’s house to hear God’s story, a story that includes you and me. It is a story that binds us together as brothers and sisters in Christ. It is a love story that continues in God’s love. God continually reminds us that His love story, our love story, always ends with… “and they lived happily ever after!”

I pray you will come and be a part of the greatest story ever told or lived. May your story be blessed.

Blessings,

Pastor Russel